Mikki Nylund, know to Macjammers as mikkinylund, is among the most inventive songwriters on the site. He lyrics plow new ground, continually surprise as well as prick the conscience. He tries his hand at nearly every music genre, depending on what the concept of his latest song requires. I look forward to every post, knowing he will bend and twist some aspect of my expectation.
Like several MJers, he is also a visual artist. He studied art at two major art schools back in Scandinavia, then turned to writing and studied at a writing school. Mikki’s winding life path has gone through many places, many phases. An interesting read. But it has always involved music. As he says, “I’ve been involved in various music, arts and writing projects since I was about 7 years old. Music has always been a part of everything I did and do, even on such a simple level as taking shower. Today I am determine to continue working on my dreams and visions, and have many different, interesting and challenging projects. I can more than ever see how art, writing, music and life goes hand in hand.”
I’ve also noticed that much of his music has to do with love as a revolutionary force. And, incidentally, socialism. I ask him to expound on this a bit…
Much of your music is about love as a revolutionary force. And socialism…
“It’s not so much about socialistic revolution, as about self-revolution and the revolution of love, a humanistic revolution if you will. When I was younger, I was much more politically involved. I worked with a group within the socialist/marxist movement in the North of Sweden. We arranged concerts and such, raised money to aid in the freedom for South Africa (did print thousands of papers that we smuggled into South Africa to spread the word in regards to the revolution), Nicaragua etc. I also worked for VPK, Vänster Partiet Kommunisterna (The Left Communist Party, today The Left Party), that has between 6-10% of all votes in Swedish elections. Later I joined some Anarchy groups, but found that most groups, whether how good their intentions and visions are; they’re still groups among groups and that change don’t come easy. I figured change needed to to come from inside, and be built around yourself and your own history and surroundings, rather than pick up someone else’s manifesto and speak of that.
“As of such, today my life is much more that of a philosopher than a political activist. I see demonstrations today, and I think to myself: “Was that me?” It wasn’t. Back then we stood for what we said, whether it was right or not, we always debated our beliefs. It makes me sad to see Anarchists hiding themselves behind masks, with cobble stones in their hands, using violence as a part of their language. I can’t see anything good coming out of that, and as of such chose not to be a part of it. You can take any name you wish: Anarchist, Communist, Capitalist, Socialist, Christian, Jew…and you can all do wrong, that is what scares me about groups. It’s something fundamental about them, they all think they’re better than the other groups. If politics were my religion, I no longer believe in its God. ”
I noticed on your profile page you say “I can more than ever see how art, writing, music and life goes hand in hand.” Please explain…
“I’ve probably answered this in my above answers, but as a conclusion: ‘How could any of them exist without the other?’ I never like to be too obvious in my art, or statements, I always believed that some kind of magic must be kept for the philosophy, drama, love, and art to prevail. I just want to add a few lines from one of my earlier songs, Garbo. This may explain it, or perhaps not:
it’s twelve o’clock
look at the clock, one hand has met the other hand
isn’t that wonderful
that’s the way a clock works, what’s wonderful about it?
ninotchka, it’s midnight
one half of Paris is making love to the other half
Where were you born? What are your origins?
“I grew up in Finland and Sweden, Scandinavia. In my early years I discovered the passion for the fine arts, although I did not have a name or understanding of it. Directly after high school, I attended my first Art School, then moved to Umeå in the north of Sweden where I continued study art. I played in a lot of bands, did art performances, had several exhibitions and discovered the written word. I was accepted to Biskops Arno, a famous writing school, and spent a year with poetry writing short stories and novels. After this school I moved to Copenhagen to write a novel, a small apartment on Istedgade (famous street) amongst hookers and junkies. My son Ismael was soon born, and I moved back to Umeå. Attended a marketing school when I figured art alone would not be enough, financially to support a family. I wasn’t Picasso.
“Directly after I finished the marketing school I was hired as a copywriter for the famous advertising agency Nord & Syd (North & South), then started working for another agency down in Stockholm, Gazoline, as a copywriter/art director.
“One day, long thereafter, I had split up with the mother to my son, and I met a girl. She was from the USA, and some moons later I moved over here. We are now divorced but we share a daughter, Zoë.
“I still live in Portland, Maine, raising my daughter Zoë (10), writing music, articles, designing clothes, developing web and multimedia design, advertising and marketing, writing on a novel, drinking my beer, and live with my wonderful girlfriend Jennifer (who is also a writer and makes jewerly), and her son 10-year-old son Dominic, who is part Lumbee Indian.
“I am older now, 42 years old. Life has found its temporary harmony and balance. I am quite happy. I am quite sad. Love is a great act of balance.
“Just so I don’t sound like an Island-gigolo-jumper, I still have very good contact with both moms, with both children whom I love the most, as well as everyone else involved in my past and present life. ”
So much between the lines in that story. How has this history, that includes a certain amount of loss and leave-taking, affected your music?
“I don’t believe that my life has impacted my music in different ways than life would to anyone else. Life is music – music is life. Of course, I could seek examples through my history, which could then potentially be tied to a particular song, however, I don’t see the need to examine my music in this way, it would take away some of the pleasure and magic. In a larger perspective, I think there has always been some kind of longing in my music, no matter the topic. This may have to do with the lack of roots, moving around my whole childhood and youth. Now, when I’ve seemed to have found my roots, they’re on the other side of the planet. But, would I ever have found them would I not had distant myself from them?”
What do you do for a “living”?
“I work as a freelancer with a variety of different projects: clothing design, marketing and advertising, web design, print design, multimedia, programming, mobile phone development and on rare occasions also some music (yeah!). I think in retrospect, I forced myself to chose a type of work that would still enable me to be creative. But, I have honestly sold my soul several times. Things are going better these days however I can afford myself to be more selective with my choice of clients. I generally hate the corporate side of anything, but you have to do what you have to do.”
Do you find the USA much different than other places you’ve lived?
“When I first arrived in the USA I thought things where kind of similar, but the more time I spend here, I realized it’s not (long story, deep cultural differences). Of course I’ve lived here for about ten years and we all know who ruled eight of them, so in a way, I feel I’ve seen the worst face of USA, and still have to meet the real persona. I feel optimistic in regards to the next ten years – doesn’t look good today, but being poor sometimes brings out the best of hearts. ”
Do your current circumstance influenced your music?
“I am sure it has some effect on my music living in Maine, just like it did, and would, living anywhere. I’ve lived in both the countryside as well as in cities. That in itself is definitely different, not only in living standards, but also how I live with sounds. In the city, where I currently live, there’s always sounds: cars, trains, airplanes, buzzing city sound everywhere any hour of the day. You can’t hide from it; energy, electricity, bzzzzz. When I lived in the countryside, it was different. I could hear the nature, and I mean, in a way I’ve never done before. It was healthy. I started to see how different sounds could be used, in ways I’ve never used them before: grasshoppers, birds, the lake, the wind etc. I miss that quite often.”
Did you ever publish your novel?
“No, I never did. This is a problem that I have been carrying around my whole life. I am never satisfied with anything I do. None of my writing, none of my art, none of my music… I did write 3-4 novels, and actually had one of them ready to be sent out, already in envelopes with address and stamps, but they got forgotten in a closet. I did publish some short stories and poetry in some Scandinavian magazines, but that’s it. It’s kind of funny though, in its own little tragedy; I have one of my books next to me, sitting on top of the computer. I look at it sometimes, and it gives me relief and inspiration. Sort of like the book I wrote for myself. It’s written in Swedish, and I haven’t read it in a long, long time.”
How old were you when you got into playing music?
“Very young. I grew up with a drunk grandfather that used to sing me his tear filled tango’s between the stories of the wars (Finnish Winter War and World War II). I believe that I somehow was struck by lightning from his words. Melodies where inside my head, but not out publicly. My mother played the organ an my father (huge Elvis fan) sung while cooking his food on the gas stove. I played the organ in my first band when I was seven, so I figure I must have learned how to play perhaps at five, six years old. The band was called ‘The Ice Creams‘ – we had 50’s haircuts, Brylcreem, played 50’s covers and had a gig every Saturday at a local place where the kids hung out. We were paid in hot dogs and lemonade and all the girls loved us. We were the stars.”
Do you still find yourself wanting to feel again that first fleeting rush of performance success?
“The Ice Creams where formative of course, but as a young boy, it was more about fitting into groups, looking right, be on with the current style(s). I remember that I had a secret admiration of Punk Rock, which would not have been acceptable as The Ice Cream’s where all about the 50’s. Sometimes during this period, I started art classes, and hung out with a guy that was totally like Sid Vicious. This lead to me being kicked out of the 50’s group, and so, I became a punk-rocker. After that I’ve had many performance successes in my life, and I would be lying would I not want to see that happening again.
Any surviving photos of you in a mowhawk?
“I have one (http://www.mikkinylund.com/mikki_mohawk.jpg) – I don’t know, a lot of moving makes you lose things along the way.”
Has Ismael or Zoe ever had a similar period of style rebellion?
“Zoë is a bit too young to be a rebel, and Ismael turned to sports. Almost all of my brothers (I am the oldest and I have four younger brothers), are all into the punk rock scene, wearing mohawks, tattoo’s and things like that. Maybe it’s every other generation that rebels?
What happened after you moved beyond The Ice Creams? “I joined a punk-rock band called General Bildt (Mr. Bildt was and still is a Right Wing Swedish politician) in a city called Umeå, in the Northern Sweden. I sang and had a mohawk. We had a nice following. This band turned in to Marilyn Moscow, now with a bit more European, Gothic influences. In between I also played in a lot of experimental settings, sort of like performance art: 7177 Bombay (Stalingrad) where we all hung upside down from the roof while performing.”
How did you perform upside down and not pass out? (and did you tuck in your shirt?)
“Well, to be honest, we didn’t play a whole concert hanging upside down, it was only portions of the performance, ha, ha!
“Oh, I also remember I had a band that only performed Kim Wilde covers. Later I had a Tango-Punk orchestra with a semi-local-success. I sang and played the accordion. We where so god damn serious. All the songs where about Vodka, broken hearts, lousy men, lousy girls and nylon shirts. Our main hit was called ‘Ritva’ a story about a woman named Ritva, who me and the guitar player found in a bar in Finland the day before some New Years (don’t remember the year, sorry). Anyway, we did enter the bar early the day before, after all, we where still young and this is what young people could do back then. We sat at the bar, and this woman came to sit with with us. I’d say 45-50 years old, read head, no teeth or very few, and she started to hit on us. Young and proud as we where, we found it particularly amusing. Boys are boys. We bought her beer, not with any particular intention of course. All of a sudden a man came into the bar and shouted: Ritva Fucking Hell!!! and then something else in Finnish (I am sure not very friendly words). They started to fight, and were soon thrown out. So we had to write her a song. Sometimes you just have to do things in honor of somebody or something.”
Any surviving recordings from the Tango-Punk band?
“The name of the song was Av livet svårt sårade män (From Life Heavily Wounded Men… I told you we were so serious). I do have some recording from a concert we gave. Unfortunately I have no idea where. They’re on a backup CD somewhere, and I have 100’s and 100’s of backup CD’s… I thought it would be fun to have one of these songs up on my server and provide you with a link, so I will do my best to look for them. There where a few other songs recorded at concert we gave, but I haven’t been able to locate them. It’s been years since I’ve listened to them, so it would bring me pleasure in many different ways.”
Why did you get into music?
“Very difficult to answer, as I am sure every other musician would say. I grew up poor and perhaps I needed to find a way to ‘stick out’, find a way ‘out of there’? I remember when I was six years old, I drew Disney pictures which I tried to sell by knocking on doors in the small Finnish village where I lived. I think I already knew back then that my life was destined for something different. I just didn’t have the words for it yet. My family, a rather large one, always used to say: ‘You are not going to make it, none of this family does!’ I said: ‘You just watch!’ And truly I did not make it very far in reality – but in life, experiences and miles I visited the moon.
“As far as musical influences, like I mentioned above, I grew up around the Tango, 50’s and 60’s music. Elvis, Johnny Cash, Jim Reeves, ABBA etc. I have no idea whether or not this has influenced me, and how much, but I guess it must have.”
Do you recall the first song ever wrote?“No, I have absolutely no idea. It must have been when I was around seven, eight, but hey, that is like a lifetime ago. I am sure it was very, very cheesy, probably something greasy. However, I would love to remember, I just can’t. ”
Current music activities?
“I write, record, and mix my songs and spread them online on a regular basis. Would like to have a band but haven’t found the right people yet, and in all honesty, I haven’t been looking all that much. I would LOVE to find someone that would share my musical background and visions. Tried to play with a band from Boston for a while, Lucretia’s Daggers, but it never worked out.”
Are you looking band in need of a socialist accordion playing singer-songwriter into punk, tango, vodka and hanging upside down?
“Well, they wouldn’t have to be that different. I’ve tried a few times, joined this band from Boston, and have played (and still am playing) with some local people. I just met a girl with whom I may do some collaborations soon. They don’t have to be like-minded, but open-minded is very important to me. I could not join a band where they are trying to sound like somebody else or are locking themselves into a certain genre.”
Are you still planning on going to a studio? What songs have you identified as worthy of that sort of effort?
“I am planning on it. Have the studio, a friend of mine is the mixing engineer. I am thinking of going in with just minimal ideas on what to do. New songs, and see what happens. It may sound a little bit lose, but I have musicians already lined up to play with me. Like three different drummers for example, all with their individual, unique styles. I would see it as an experiment, and will probably have the songs done on piano, the melody and the lyrics. All the songs are going to form a more complete picture. In the studio, I will arrange and try different musicians, to what happens with the songs. Just as I do when I am writing recording at home. ”
What are your current musical aspirations?
“I used to have goals, but these days I am just happy to be able to create…I think. I still have goals and visions, but they’re more on a personal level these days. I enjoy spreading the word and the sound, and get really excited every time someone finds the time to listen, read my lyrics, and actually get it. As silly and naive as it may sound, my main goal is to spread love. ”
You say you like spreading the word about yourself. How exactly do you do this? Are you musically active on the Internet outside MJ?
“Well, I do write a lot, but I could honestly ‘spread’ my wings further. When I first moved to the USA, I still wrote short stories for a Scandinavian Arts Magazine, this is something I’d very much would look to get back to. I love writing. These days I spread my writing mostly through music, at MacJams, Facebook, MySpace etc., but I do have songs elsewhere on the internet as well, although I can’t remember exactly where. I posted my songs to a place yesterday, but they have not been approved yet. ”
Any people you’ve worked with we might recognize?
“Probably not, unless you’re from Sweden. I played with Henke from Ray Wonder (alternative pop), now he plays with CLOWN; and Helena Espvall, an excellent cello, guitar virtuous and vocalist (she joined my Tango orchestra for a very brief moment). I did see her perform here in Portland a few months ago together with Masaki Batoh – if you ever have the chance to see this duo, please do, they are awesome!!!
“I did rehearse with Messhuggah. And one of my bands, Marilyn Moscow, opened up for Refused before they got their fame. I’ve carried amps for Mikael Wiehe. Done an interview with Lars Demian (Swedish Folk/Tango/Punk). While playing with a band called Puffin, we opened up for Teddybears. (Note: I do not appear on the Puffin MySpace recordings.)
What obstacles have you overcome in your musical endeavors?
“There’s always obstacles, and they are mostly overcome. This is, and will always be the core of any art. If you don’t have obstacles, what’s in it for you? One of the greatest obstacle of them all is inspiration, where to find the muse. I just can’t sit down and make music, well, I can, but it won’t come out any good. I need the idea, the fuse, the muse, the dream, the vision, the idea…whatever… The obstacles always effect the outcome of my music; I only see this as a natural, necessary part of any creative process. ”
Most fun you ever had with music?
“I miss the craziness of the punk-rock movement, not like it is now, but back when it happened and you could be political and express whatever you wanted to and it was actually a movement that was considered dangerous by some. The excitement of putting out an EP, with the next-door neighbor designing the EP art work, and your friends putting up posters all over the town for the next concert; NO CHARGE, PAY WHAT YOU CAN, ALL THE MONEY GOES TO THE FREEDOM OF SOUTH AFRICA!!! I miss a little of the circus, and dadaism, the moment not planned, this is now, we can do it. But, so I hear, there are voices like this awakening again. ”
If there was a scene as crazy as the early punk movement, would you have the energy or inclination to join in? Or is that a younger man’s game?
“If the movement has Peace & Love in it, I would for sure have the energy to join. But, I am not talking 1968, what was was, what is is, and what’s to be, has to be. ”
Most embarrassing moment?
“Oh my… Fell asleep in the bass-drum of the a Finish hardcore band WDM, and brutally awoke to a song in 180BPM. Not that many embarrassing music related things that I can remember really, but I am sure there where many. ”
“Classic music, tango, punk, early goth movement (Nick Cave & The Birthday Party, Siouxie, Fad Gadget, Swans, Diamanda Galas etc.), selected 60’s music (The Byrds, The Hep Stars, The Kinks, Johnny Cash etc), selected 70’s music (Beatles, John Lennon, ABBA, Black Sabbath, Leonard Cohen, David Bowie…), selected 80’s music (Eurythmics, DEVO, Depeche Mode, Einstürzende Neubauten, Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds, Tom Waits, too many to mention), selected 90’s music up until today (Sigur Ros, Helena Espvall, Portishead, Kings of Leon, Radiohead, 22 Pistepirkko, Bob Log III, Nick Cave, any many more)… There are so many influences. I am not shy at what I listen too. I love it all. No style, no particular artist really, although I mention a few above. I can also enjoy an old Buddy Holly, a gracious and sad Billy Holiday, a trumpeting Evert Taube (early Swedish folk and tango), a crying Edith Piaf, a Rolling Stone, a Beatle, a Chicago Jazz, an African dance, a funky-funk, a old skool Kraftwerk… Music is about expression and communication.”
Non-music influences that might also be relevant?
“Many writers, movie directors, painters, designers, movements – to mention a few: Margaurite Duras, Jayne-Ann Phillips, Laurie Anderson, Charles Bukowski, Buddhism, Dadaism, Surrealism, Beatnick, Aki Kaurismaki, Lydia Lunch, Jim Jarmush, Ingmar Bergman, European movies, Mr, Biafra (his words), Emma Goldman, Krapotkin, John Lennon (his words), Olof Palme (Swedish Social Democratic Politician), and always my family and friends…”
What is your recording process?
“Very simple. I have an idea, I pick up an instrument, I hold it in my hands, look at it, lay it down to play, I let it flow, I record, I continue until I have a song. This does not mean there doesn’t have to be many takes; it has. I generally start with either piano, guitar or bass until the song forms itself. Sometimes other instruments. Then I record instruments by instrument trying to build a foundation. Sometimes I hide layers I am not sure if I want to use or not, they may come in handy later. Add vocals, often in layers and different harmonies too. My songs never form themselves in my head, it’s a progress, just like my painting, color upon color.”
Main instrument, secondary instruments?
“No main and no secondary really. I play most instruments and whatever falls on my mind, that’s it. I’ve started making songs on most instruments, and sometimes non-instruments like a dish, a piece of glass, stone-to-stone, anything.”
“I am using Garageband for simplicity reasons, have Logic Pro and Reason also, but tend to fall toward the love for music instead the of the love for gears and applications. I still have a cheap microphone (Behringer B-1), don’t currently have a midi/audio interface and am broke (gave it away to my son who was visiting from Sweden and who is 16 and wants to learn how to write music, what can you do?), have cheap but functional electric guitars, bass, violin, accordion, keyboards, hand drums etc. It’s all a lower-end collection, no Fender’s, no Gibson’s, none of that. I am happy with what I have though. ”
How do you mix/master?
“When it comes to mixing, I am terrible at it I have to admit. I’ve learned how to listen I guess, but sometimes it takes forever to please my ears. I would love to know how to record instruments and vocals straight and clean, but unfortunately I don’t think my gear will allow to go much further as far as the sound goes. It always has the huzz and fuzz, fizz and hizz. ”
Musically, what is your strongest point?
“I have ideas, different and unique ones I hope, and I am not afraid of letting the music come to me instead of me choosing the music. I hope that I am viewed as an inspirational, creative and unique musician, that more often than not throw the golden glitter in the air. I surprise myself all of the time anyway. That’s what it’s all about, to be your own magician.”
Your weakest point and how you get around it?
“I move too fast! When I get an idea, it’s not long before the song is there, and then I move on to the following idea. I am like a damn highway. It always bugs me that I don’t seem to find time nor interest to go back and polish my songs; the presence is already here. Again, it may have to do with the fact that I don’t think my songs can be taken much further, musically for sure, but technically, I am not so sure. I am planning on going into a studio, but it’s a matter of cost. ”
How do you come up with a song?
“No rules here, it goes anyway any in every single way. Lyrics first, music first, sound first, a melody, just a general idea or concept. My music always change as I am working with it, it’s whatever comes to me, sometimes lyrics change the music, sometimes the music changes the lyrics and so on. Almost none of my songs sounds the same at the beginning as in the end. ”
Tips for others?
“Not really. Sorry to sound dry. I believe every musician needs to find his or hers own road, agenda, visions and goals. Since music means so many different thing to every person, it’s very difficult to give a general answer. Personally, I find it important to stay true to oneself, but then again, does that mean one can’t try to sound like Metallica? It’s not up to me to define. As far as recording goes, I’ve found most of the help I needed I found by searching online, reading posts at places like MacJams, and just worked very hard to learn. Sometimes it felt like I would never understand certain things, but I did, so that would be a general tips; don’t give up. ”
How has your MacJams experience been?
“Macjams has been a very friendly community to me, both in rants and raves, bravos and boohs. I’ve learned so much through this site, not only in regards to music and mixing, but also a lot about myself as a person. I have discovered friends through Macjams, but no enemies thus far (that I know about). Sometimes I’ve gotten such deep and thoughtful posts by truly, very intelligent and passionate people. Macjams is unique.”
How did you discover Macjams?
“I think I did a search for Garageband when I first got it and had no idea how to use it.”
What MacJams experience was helpful to you or led to some sort of insight?
“So many experiences… The time Peter Greenstone put a dark cello on my song Sebago Lake – this version is not the one with Peter in it, I am sorry to say I’ve lost the recording he sent me…
– that was a huge moment for me. And all the truly inspirational words from everybody. I wish I’ve had more time to collaborate, though. Maybe soon.”
What MJ song you are most proud of?
“I don’t work like that, I like them all, and most of the times I feel that the latest is my best. My songs are also so different from each other, that it would be like picking Swedish Smorgosbord from McDonald’s. Sometimes I’ve discovered that when I go back and listen to some of my older material and I’ve almost forgotten about the song, that it sounds different, I listen to it in a new light. This is still very magic to me, that I can create music that lives on its own, even to myself. I am sure I am not the only musician having the same feelings and experiences. ”
How has the Internet changed your music goals, your way of creating music, your time management?
“I don’t think it has changed much personally, it was pretty much the same back with the 4-track Porta-Studio, or the first recording I made with a cassette player, recorded it, moved that tape into another tape recorder, and played to the recording while dubbing things on and on, on and on… Well, that’s about my relationship to music, in all honesty. The internet allows me to share my music instantly. I like that, because I am very eager as a person. When I started making music it was still a matter of spreading cassette demos, participate on collection LP’s, fanzines etc. I don’t think the internet has changed much as far as goals, creations or time management goes, but for sure, the immediate online scene is right there, right now.”
What do you hope for regarding the future of Macjams?
“I would like to see a live MACJAMS MUSIC FESTIVAL. I think Apple (or Garageband and Logic), and some other music related companies, owe it to Macjams to sponsor such an event. Potentially a traveling festival that pick up artist in selected cities, just for the pure reason of spreading the love of and for music. I mean, there’s a lot about tools, mixing and so on – but essentially, music comes from the same place in people today as it did hundreds of years ago; to perform, sing, laugh and dance.
When you talk about a Macjams Music Festival, you mean a live gig, right?
“Well, this is not well thought out on my behalf, but yes, live music of course. But, I could also see it being a festival including gears, software presentation, musical instrument presentations etc., and by including these commercial elements, one could potentially be able to finance such a thing. ”
Is ‘Mikki’ short for something?
“My real name is Kaj Valfrid Mikael Nylund. (The Swedish way as written on my birth certificate.) But I go by Mikki Nylund.”
Is there something more the MJ community might not know about you?
“I love to cook and spend hours in the kitchen. I read a lot of politics online. I am a researcher. If I get something on my mind, for example when I write lyrics, I need to find out everything about that particular topic. ”
Any poetry you’d like to share?
“Here are two of my latest poems:
A Sunny Day
Everyone can be Ernest for a day.
From the Pier – I am the a hawk, staring at synchronized moves below.
A wave, a seagull, a beer – that is all it takes. I like the Pier,
mostly because it is the only thing that gives me a true purpose
in that specific moment – where else would I be found?
On the beach painting myself with dangerous strays of sun?
Perhaps, looking at all the women – but they all seem alike to me;
it’s them and their golden brown bodies, their gingerbread walks,
all in one like a pitiful herd.
The Pier is my savior, although I have nothing in common
with its crowd. I don’t pray with them you see.
I don’t even know exactly whom their savior may be.
I just take the seat at the bench of sinners
and with a warm and blushed heart sin myself away.
This is how. In the corner – death – as I confused kiss the back of its dirty face, right at the source of its first fight. My heart keeps me from falling asleep. Just you and me and that false script; life walks like a thousand feet. That is how it shaped itself. Like a bread of bad disease, of hunger, manifestation and damn grief. Even the blood is not as red anymore, and it runs so slowly through its long canals.
Existentialism – that phenomenon we don’t speak of anymore. Perhaps words have dried out in warm and humid winds. But to me – everything is per usual. I play you every night on my manic stage and you have yet to, soon, find your own epidemic.